A few years ago, I truly lost my way…I thought I knew which way I was headed…I was STUCK in life.  Of course this by my own choosing, because I was ignoring the call of the greater power.  I was exhibiting freewill – yes things were terribly wrong, I was not happy, but I was too afraid to make changes.

So many times we see something wrong with our own life, but instead of having the courage to change, we wait for someone else to do the changing, so we spend a lifetime of misery.  I am here to say, I am no longer stuck and I finally found the courage to make the changes I should have made years ago.

I could sit here and say I don’t know how it happened, things “just happened” and I “didn’t see it coming” or “I thought things were going to get better”…that’s just not true – sometimes the truth is in front of you, you just refuse to see it.

Every action I committed played a part in bringing me to where I was – but I’m not there anymore – I saw the truth, I felt the truth, I am living truth.

I used to think I was too far away to be “saved”, I should just be thankful I was floating above water with a tiny oar all my own, and it was too late for me to turn things around.  Thankfully, I am not there anymore – I found my oar, I found my peace, I found my voice to say, “NO MORE”!

I am truly thankful for those who walked along side in silence and waited for me to find grace – who spoke the truth to me in love and gently prodded me to truth.  I’m extremely indebted to those who showed me the error of my ways and waited patiently for me to catch up and face my fears and to not stay in the dark – to come towards the light.

Life seems so much brighter now, the sky seems bluer, the rain not as gray, the grass definitely is greener, the birds sing louder, I feel lighter!!

I finally found home.  Home is not a house, it’s not living with people, it is not laundry, cooking, cleaning, and refilling toilet paper rolls.

Home – home is in the arms of a Savior who sees all of me and loves me just as I am.  Home is being comfortable in the muck and knowing you’re not alone – home is the security of facing your giants and conquering them!  I am here to face them, to slay them, I have my slingshot I have my stone!

I will never be perfect, but I am loved by one who most certainly is perfect!  I believe I was put on earth for a purpose – I am here to be a fisher of men, a fisher of women, to help the broken, the wounded, the hurt, the ones who feel worthless…I am here to feel, to love, to care, to show kindness, to empathize, to sympathize, and to show people their life too can be full of God’s wonderful GRACE!

There are life changing moments we all have, there is the one AHA! Moment as Kyle Idleman so eloquently writes about in his book, there is the one morning you wake up and realize you are worth more than the life you are living…I am so overwhelmed by the steps of confronting, condemning and the courage I have been given through our Lord and Savior – His wonderful mercy and grace have proven to be my best friend…it was always there, I just needed to see it, to reach for it, to rest in IT!  In Him…I remain in Him…

If you think you are stuck, if you think you cannot come home, if you think you’re too far away, hang tight, grab this oar, because like me, you never are!!  Romans 8:6.

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