We all go through seasons in life and I the season I am currently experiencing has been present for about a year now – I get up, get ready for my day and am perfectly happy, smiling, ready to face the day and then BAM! Something triggers my negative monster and down the depression, despair (insert any negative adjective you have HERE!) down the slide I go!

I’ve been doing this working, single mom thing for about 8 years now, but in reality, it’s been 17 – not having a parental partner that was/is supportive – so I’ve been doing it alone…not that I mind a bit because I am truly blessed with the most wonderful daughter on the plant (sorry, mom, Debbie doesn’t win that one!)

With this current financially challenging season, I sometimes wonder if I am in a boat all alone.  I wonder because I have noticed when one starts speaking of financial challenges, I am often met with “oh, yes, I completely understand what you’re going through” only to be faced with the next sentence of “by the way, my new boat, car, motorcycle, summer home, vacation spot, concert, winery visit (insert whatever luxury item you want here)” and then I think “seriously, how does that relate to I have $5 in my checking account and need gas, groceries, toilet paper…blah, blah, blah…”  Sometimes I want scream (hear Jeff Foxworthy’s voice now) “If you have money to buy toilet paper and get a happy meal you have no clue what I’m talking about”  LOL  And, yes, I do have all my NEEDS met but every now and again it would be nice to be able and get a new pair of shoes for my 8-4 job, a couple of new bras, new undies (and yes, Victoria’s Secret do last 8 years or longer and I think that’s the secret), or a new pair of shoes for Olivia (can you wear flip flops all year round? I think you can!  LOL)

I am not feeling sorry for myself here either.  I am just wondering when this current season will end and financial abundance will prevail.  When Olivia had cancer there was an end in sight, I knew after two years we would be moving on one way or another, but with single parent land, this there is no definitive answer.  And, that’s okay…I will power through.

I do have to take a moment, however and truly thank a few who have read my blog, and/or facebook posts and who continue to support me privately and/or publically – Diane, Melanie, Carol, Chris, and Jay.  Your true friendship, compassion, support, “actions taken” mean more to mean than you could ever imagine and I hope you know you can ALWAYS count on me for ANYTHING you may need, including dog food/pet care!  Love you all!

I know this season too shall pass and I will be okay.  I know I have inside me a faith so strong that as the song says “I get knocked down but I’ll get up again…and again….and again…and yet again…..”  I truly know “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” I should be so strong right now I could move Mt. Everest…I know I can and will keep paddling, keep climbing, keep running “this race God has set out for me” and I know God has instilled in me an energizer bunny stamina to will keep going, and going…and going…not because I don’t have a choice, because I do, and I chose to live each day, to be thankful for my true friends who are with me every step, a God who created me, carries me, sustains me, believes in me…I am truly blessed – even though the troubles are heavy, I can carry them, for with God all things are possible! Keep smiling…

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